


On The Road

by lafgayette



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Road Trips, im going to hell, it's the kerouac au literally no one wanted!!, sirius writes marauder musicals, there is a goat involved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-27
Updated: 2016-06-27
Packaged: 2018-07-18 14:10:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7318351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lafgayette/pseuds/lafgayette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s really happening then? We’re doing this road trip thing?”</p><p>“Stop with the dubious tone, Re! It’s happening! I can see it now, my name and the musical's surrounded by lights on Broadway: Kerouac Goes Camp.” Sirius grins manically from Remus’s lap.</p><p>“Oh good god.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	On The Road

“Sirius, you’re being dramatic.”

Sirius freezes, a hand held to his heart and the other against his forehead, turning to glare at Remus.

“It’ the end of an era! The Marauder Era!” He cries, falling to the rickety wooden floor of the tree house. The four of them had built it, cherubic faces creased in concentration as they pulled together pieces of old wood and scrap materials. Sirius had wielded the hammer with an incredible disregard for safety and sanity. It had been a miracle that the only injury sustained was a slight chip on the front of Peter’s tooth and an agreement to perpetually ban Sirius from being allowed near the tools. With the sheer will of prepubescence, the rickety wooden box was built nestled in the thick branches of the oak tree in James’s backyard. Sirius had dubbed it the Marauder Tree House. He hadn’t been the wittiest of thirteen year olds. Nevertheless, the tree house had came to be the location of all important Marauderly matters and decisions. 

As Sirius clutches his heart on the creaky wooden floor in faux betrayal, his leg scrapes against a rusty nail. Wincing, he turns his glare to the filthy rusted metal. A traitorous best friend and now tetanus. The injustice of it all, really. 

“We’ll stay friends! Right?” Peter pipes up, glancing around at the other three hesitantly. 

“Of course we will, Wormy!” James claps Peter on the back, unaware of his own brute strength, as Peter topples to the ground besides Sirius. “Sorry bout’ that mate,” James grins, helping Peter extract his face from the floor. 

Sirius huffs, rolling onto his back. Remus places a placating hand on his thigh, and no sooner as the tingles from this motion reverberate through Sirius’s body is the hand extracted. Sirius huffs once more, pulling himself into a sitting position besides Remus. 

“I hate to sound like a self-help book, but why not focus on the positives?” Remus asks, eyebrow raised.

“Because, Moony! This is it! Our final exam week, then it’s all gone. We’ll never go back to the boarding school again! Dumbledore’s beautiful crocs, McGonagalls' undying love for me, Snivellus’ hair that is surely bathed in the fryers at McDonald’s; all gone!” Sirius wails.

“Have you quite finished your soliloquy?” Remus taunts, trying to cheer Sirius up. Out of the three boys, Remus was the only one observant enough to realise the genuine concerns underlying Sirius’s grandiose theatrics and mania.

“He’s right, you know,” James interrupts, requiring Sirius to complete the unfortunate task of looking away from Remus. “Six years, absolutely inseparable. And now we’re being torn away from each other by the cruel, callous grip of adulthood.”

“Is overreacting catching?” Remus quips, brow raised in mirth. “Listen, if you’re all going to be such sappy sentimentalists - “

“Says the one creating a scrap book,” Sirius interjects.

“We should do one last Marauderly activity!” Remus continues, unperturbed. Sirius brightens at that, a dog with a bone, as James leans in curiously. 

“But we’ve already done our yearly prank?” Peter asks, making a question out of a statement. The four smile fondly, the horrified faces of their teachers and peers as hundreds of fake squids rained down upon them in the great hall flashing through their minds. 

James breaks the nostalgic reminisce. “Yeah, of which was ingenious, but let’s do one last thing just for us. No boyfriends! No girlfriends! No romantic or sexual partners of any gender!” 

“Are you insinuating that you’ve had a girlfriend, James? Because a total of eighty-three rejections from She Who Shall Not Be Named over the past years tends to indicates otherwise.” James' smile doesn’t falter at Sirius’ words, yet his eyes betray the gleaming grin. Darkening to glare murderously above the bright flash of teeth, the combination has quite an unsettling effect on Sirius. 

“Right! One last activity to help us forget our, er, woes?” Peter interjects, trying to make James’s gaze look slightly less than that of a deranged killer. 

“If we’re all in such need of poignant revelations, why don’t we hit the road? Kerouac it up.” Remus jokes, sarcasm thick.

“YES!” Sirius screeches, having immediately forgotten about his impending murder from the man sitting across from him. “Remus, you genius! Who knew books could make you smart? Road trip, motherfuckers!” Sirius yells, he and James immediately launching into a rendition of On the Road Again. Their thick, put upon Texan accents rivaling those only of when they sing Cotton Eyed Joe.

“Joking! I was joking!” Remus tries, inevitably drowned out as the two begin to do-si-do in the small space, Peter clapping along reverently. They finish, bowing, and sit back down to Remus’s relief.

“So,” Sirius pants, “It is decided! A road trip.”

“It is?” Remus asks.

“Where to?” Peter inquires skeptically.

“What in?” James interjects.

“Yes! Anywhere! Your van is up for the trip, Petey dearest! To the Marauder Mobile!” Sirius grins, elated.

“I thought we decided on the Mystery Van?” James frowns  
.  
“How many times must I tell you,” Remus sternly addresses James, “Its name is Van Gogh.”

“I told you guys I chose to name it Bob!” Peter sighs, long since tired of the debate.

“Yes, and we chose to ignore it,” Sirius replies, settling himself very platonically into his dude bro’s lap. He pushes his head against Remus’ hand until he complies, softly playing with the silky black strands. Sirius sighs contently, “So we travel, maybe up North, in Peter’s van! A Marauder road trip, full of joy and laughter before becoming clogs in the machinery of society. The journey shall begin in this tree house, and here it shall end! After a road trip of camaraderie, love and musicals!” Sirius gesticulates wildly, despite his limited movement in Remus’s lap. He would rather pantomime eating his own foot in this position than dare move from the glory of Remus’s warm thighs. 

At the word ‘musical’, the other three groan. Sirius' grin only brightens, thinking back to when it had all began.

Sirius’s musicals began as a puberty stricken thirteen-year-old. The initial musical, written in their first year at the boarding school, followed the adventures of the Marauder’s first Christmas together, appropriately titled ‘Dumbledore is Secretly Santa’. Following it was the Easter Extravaganza musical in second year, featuring the hit song “God Is Gay and So Am I”, the tear-jerking coming out ballad he had nervously performed for his friends. By sixth year titles such as ‘Four Friends And Fire Whiskey’, ‘You Walked In On Me With A Guy’s Fingers In My Ass’ and ‘(Remus Is) Bi Bi Bi’ had joined his folio. In seventh year, Sirius wrote like a mad man, his favorite songs including, ‘Hair So Greasy It’s a Fire Hazard’ as an ode to Snivellus, ‘Lily’s Feelin’ Chilly (Towards You!)’, an ode to James, and ‘It’s Raining Squids Yet I’m Still Looking At You’, a secret ode to Remus. What he proclaimed to be his Marauder Musicals folio was brimming with ingenuity. 

“How much more can you even expand that folio? You can’t keep doing this,” Remus pleads, “My throat took weeks to recover after you made me perform ‘Is That A Squid In Your Pants Or Are You Just Happy To See Me.’”

“You gave a beautiful, soulful rendition. Now stop complaining, you unappreciative fucker.” Sirius pokes Remus in the thigh, unhappy his star performer was being such a diva.

“I’m fine with it, but please stop making all my solos about my virginity,” Peter begs, James laughing boisterously as Sirius cackles.

“It’s really happening then? We’re doing this road trip thing?”

“Stop with the dubious tone, Re! It’s happening! I can see it now, my name and the musical's surrounded by lights on Broadway: Kerouac Goes Camp,” Sirius grins manically from Remus’s lap.

“Oh good god.”

**Author's Note:**

> i've had this idea for half a year and finally got around to publishing it! how incredibly in-character! i'm a mess!
> 
> please tell me about any grammatical errors as i write these at 1am surrounded by pretzel crumbs


End file.
